Association of Reference Desk Volunteers

I, Cernen, hereby establish the Association of Reference Desk Volunteers for great justice, etc. etc.

Motto

Hanlon's Razor is a good choice, one supposes. Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Beliefs and ideals (the negative ones)

Sometimes, people at the reference desk ask really stupid questions. Sometimes, it makes one wonder how they managed to not drown in the gene pool. Hey, sometimes it even makes one wonder just how many times do you have to drop someone on their head or force-feed them rubber cement before they become absolutely and profoundly dorkified.

The only possible response to people with stupid questions, or questions in the headers, or people who don't obey the rules like that jackass who posted his thing about isocontainer housing in all caps which prompted me, Cernen, to create a template bashing idiots like him for doing stupid things like that...well, the only possible response is utter and total humiliation.

Either that, or a swift kick in the ass.

We, the Reference Desk Volunteers, not-so-solemnly delcare that idiots should be dealt with whilst armed with 2x4s and other LARTs of note. We declare that we're not going to stand for this crap anymore, and while we are generally required to not fault people for being people, we don't accept the fact that people are complete and total boobs.

Beliefs and ideals (the positive ones)

Similarly, we should praise those who ask good questions. Good questions are one that spark debate, that have somewhat curious or interesting answers, and don't violate any of the no-nos. Good questions are ones that make us think. We like good questions, and should be more than generous with praise for these people. "Lead by example" is a possible example of this, one supposes.

Therefore, we, the Reference Desk Volunteers, solemnly declare that people who ask thought provoking or generally interesting questions should be praised for their efforts. We declare that we're going to shower them with praise (or at least sprinkle some sugar on them) because these are the questions that make you go "hmm..." and those kinds of questions we like to answer.

For these questions, we have a template as well. {{User:Cernen/Template:goodquestion}} highlights these questions as good ones. It should be placed at the top of the question, and perhaps placed in a special section of the archives (a "Wall of Fame" of sorts).

LARTs of note

Cernen, the founder, calls them "the big four templates of mass idiot whacking." You can call them whatever you like. Generally, they are not-so-gently crafted responses to the following four "no-nos" at the reference desk:

• Don't post in all caps
  • answered by Cernen's template nocapsplz
• Don't put your question in the header/not ask a question/be really freakin' vague
  • answered by Cernen's template question, a general purpose template that allows you to tell them what an idiot they've been
• Do your own [damn] homework
  • answered by Cernen's template dyoh
• Don't list your e-mail address
  • answered by Cernen's template noemail

Of course, for you Moral Wikipedians out there, we could make a "G" series of templates, but we're jerks here, and if you can't handle the heat, why'd you sign up for the association in the first place, go pack your bags and go home.

Become a RDV

Put your name in the pot and see what cooks. It's not like we want members; anyone who is a RDV knows they're a RDV at heart and doesn't really need to post their name here, but it helps keep track of who to watch out for. Also, if you sign up, you have a much higher chance of scoring chicks and free beer. (Well...we don't make any promises about the free beer.)

It's probably also a good idea to sign up as an Amoral Wiki[mp]edian or an Immoral Wikipedian, but not necessarily necessary.

Reference Desk Volunteers

Sign below with a # and a quadtilde (four ~'s) and a message if you so choose. Or, your sigblock, followed by five ~'s so's to add the date and time. Or even better, your username enclosed in wikipedia redirect brackets, like [[w:User:So|So]].

1. Founder Cernen Xanthine Katrena 12:44, 17 January 2006 (UTC)
2. Zeizmic 13:14, 17 January 2006 (UTC)
3. hydnjo | talk well of curse course we are. 20:54, 20 January 2006 (UTC)

General secretary, bureaucracy, etc.

There is no real need for a general secretary. We all work there, and so, we are all general secretaries. (Ha ha, secretaries. Ah, I kill me.) However, should we need to adopt policies on how it should be run, such things will be decided by consnsus vote. Voting for each policy will remain open for a span of one week, at which point the votes will be tallied by someone who cares and the votes will be tallied; naturally if there are more yeas than nays, the policy goes into effect, and everyone's happy; if not, it doesn't. If there's a tie, we tally results weekly until one number is higher than the other. Very simple, very easy.

Logos, userboxen, etc.

If you want to make one, go right on ahead, nobody's stopping you. Cernen will be responsible for making something unfangly and pretty, like the Association of Wikipedians Who Are In Favor Of something something something have.